Managers are expected to spot trouble early, yet the warning signs of mental health struggles rarely look the same from one employee to the next. That makes early detection less about diagnosing symptoms and more about noticing change, according to Carmen Bellows, director of mental health at Sun Life.
Common warning signs managers should watch for include an employee who becomes more irritable, has mood swings, or shows signs of nervousness or worrying. Changes in work performance such as missing deadlines or decreasing quality of work are also key indicators.
Other signs include habitual fatigue or tiredness, increased sick days, substance misuse where employees come to work under the influence of drugs or alcohol, interpersonal conflict where they’re unable to get along with coworkers, and withdrawn behavior where they avoid people, responsibilities and social events, said Bellows.
“What we want to do as a people manager is we want to know changes in behavior,” Bellows said. “What we want to understand is the changes, how we’ve known the person to be and what we’re seeing now and be curious about those changes.”
The importance of established relationships
Managers should establish regular check-ins with their staff long before issues arise. When someone goes off work or when a problem emerges, it’s too late to start creating a relationship, she said
For new people managers, this means establishing one-on-one check-ins where they regularly meet with staff and ask questions about workload, team dynamics, and any concerns or struggles.
“If someone’s at risk of going off, if someone’s going off, or if you have to confront someone about poor behavior, you have some rapport established,” said Bellows. “You know that person and those conversations, while they may not be easy, will be less difficult because there’s some glue and elasticity because you know each other.”
Avoiding assumptions
Observable changes might include showing up physically disheveled when that’s different from historical patterns, or attendance issues like being absent on Fridays or Monday mornings. However, managers must be careful not to make assumptions.
Bellows shared an example of a situation where someone appeared tired and disheveled, leading colleagues to speculate he might be partying too much and showing up hungover. In reality, he had a new baby at home and was up all night.
“If we don’t have some level of relationship with people, we can make assumptions as opposed to being curious,” she said.
Not everyone is comfortable with certain levels of personal disclosure, and that’s not required. But before having conversations about concerns, managers should have clear examples of what they’re seeing that’s different.
Starting the conversation: The check-in
When approaching an employee about observed changes, managers should use concrete examples and curiosity rather than judgment. The check-in conversation should communicate that the manager wants to see how everything is going and should ask questions in a sensitive way.
Privacy is essential, said Bellows. Managers should hold the meeting in a private, quiet place without distractions. While offering support, managers should not pry or ask personal questions as this is unprofessional, unethical and not within their rights to ask.
An effective approach might sound like: “I’ve noticed that the past four weeks, you’ve left early on a Friday afternoon and you’re coming in late on Monday. I’ve also noticed that lots of your deliverables of these four things weren’t submitted on time and they weren’t at the same quality and caliber that I was expecting you. Can you tell me a little bit about what’s going on or if there’s some things here that I’ve been missing?”
By being curious and providing space, employees can indicate whether they’re struggling and what that might look like, she said.
Gathering data before confrontation
Before confronting someone about performance or behavior issues, managers should gather observable data. Vague statements like “they don’t seem like themselves” aren’t helpful. Concrete examples are crucial.
For instance, saying “I’ve noticed in the past two meetings, you’ve really been snippy, that you haven’t been able to engage in the way that you normally do” provides specific information the employee can respond to. They might explain they were frustrated because they felt misunderstood, or they might recognize they’re not coping well.
Clear and definitive data is valuable because it allows people to either explain their perspective or acknowledge a problem.
Staying within appropriate boundaries
As an employer, it’s irrelevant what the underlying cause of performance issues might be. The focus should be on observable information, finding out what the individual needs, and linking them to appropriate services.
“We don’t want to be digging around and trying to become a counselor or a diagnostician,” Bellows said. Instead, managers should express concern about observable patterns, ask if there’s anything they can do to help, and ensure there’s clear understanding of available resources.
This might mean directing employees to human resources, explaining what the EFAP provides, or suggesting they speak with their physician. Managers can also explore whether accommodations might help the employee work better.
“We don’t ever want to be saying to someone, ‘Hey, do you need medication? Hey, do you think that there’s something wrong?’ That’s never going to be a helpful conversation,” Bellows said. That approach creates strain rather than support.
Managers should never ask employees whether they’ve seen their doctor or what their doctor said. HR professionals or long-term or short-term disability providers may have different questions, but direct supervisors need to stay focused on observable behaviors.
“If I stick to what I know, which is the observable behaviors that I see, then I’m probably not going to make a misstep,” Bellows said.
Knowing available resources
Managers should call each of their organization’s benefit providers to learn what happens when employees reach out. If recommending someone call the EFAP, for example, managers who have called themselves can explain what to expect.
“When you call, this is what they’re going to ask. And by having that conversation, you reduce the barrier for people to make that call,” Bellows said.
If there’s an HR department, managers should leverage that resource for advice. While few people enjoy role-playing, working through difficult conversations with HR and getting scripts or specific wording can be invaluable, she said.
Managers also need to know their organizational policies, including what to do if someone is in danger. In areas of immediate physical risk, they should call 911. Canadians can now also call 988, a mental health support line available across the country in English and French.
“If you’re in doubt, I think always reaching out to get that assistance is really important,” Bellows said, noting the line doesn’t need to be reserved only for the most extreme circumstances.
The risk of waiting too long
When managers wait too long to address concerns, people become more embedded in their struggles, and shame and stigma increase. There’s also greater potential for dissent and problems within the organization.
Making mental health part of regular ongoing conversation means it’s not a big dramatic event but simply part of employment discussions, similar to reviewing where fire exits are located, she said.
However, managers need to recognize when things are escalating beyond their capacity. Severe mood swings, extreme anger or aggressive behaviors, and uncontrollable outbursts require immediate response and additional help.
Understanding when a situation has moved from a problematic but manageable behavior to a crisis is essential. Organizational policies help by providing clear protocols that remove the decision-making burden from individual managers.
Documentation and follow-up
Managers should document observations before meeting with employees. After discussions, especially those involving performance management, they should send a follow-up email outlining what was discussed, any actions agreed upon, and next steps.
This might include: “As per our conversation today, thank you for sharing your concerns regarding your lateness and providing me an explanation. We will continue to meet weekly on this. And I know that you had talked about maybe looking for some accommodations. Here’s what our organization can provide for you to help you with your time management.”
Clear documentation ensures nothing comes as a surprise. When there’s clarity and transparency, people can better meet their own needs without feeling overwhelmed, said Bellows.
Consistent check-ins
Managers should have regular check-ins with employees at predetermined intervals, whether every two weeks or every month. After an incident involving performance management or other intervention, managers should schedule a follow-up within a reasonable timeframe.
An initial check-in could be overwhelming for an employee, so creating an action plan or strategy for managing mental health-related issues may be more productive if tackled in a follow-up meeting. Although managers shouldn’t hound employees, it’s important to follow up and continue checking in at regular intervals.
“Anytime we leave a meeting, we state when the next meeting is going to happen so that people know what to expect, so that they’re not just sitting out there and feeling untethered,” Bellows said.
If there has been a specific incident, giving the employee a couple of days before the next meeting provides space to recover while ensuring they don’t feel alone in the process.
